Oregon School Counselor's "Chosen Family" Book Sparks Debate Over Parental Authority

An Oregon high school counselor has become the subject of online debate following the re-emergence of a children's book she authored, which explores the concept of "chosen family." Critics contend that the publication encourages young readers to prioritize non-biological relationships, potentially at the expense of their birth relatives, especially if they perceive a lack of acceptance within their home environment.

Madi Bourdon, a high school counselor at Milwaukie High School & Academy of the Arts, authored "A Kids Book About Chosen Family." The book is listed for children aged 5 to 9 years old, according to its online description.

The Concept of Chosen Family

The book delves into the idea of a "chosen family," which its description defines as "people who love, see, and support you for being your truest self. There are lots of people who can be a part of your chosen family, and you get to pick who makes you feel the safest and bravest."

Bourdon, in a video clip widely shared on social media, articulated the book's intent. "This book is just the invitation to discuss the importance of finding your people, those who see and love you for you, biological or not," she stated.

She further elaborated on the significance of chosen connections, asserting, "Members of one’s biological family are not always the people who are family in the ways that matter." Bourdon linked the book's message to broader societal trends, adding, "Given the tidal wave of legislation aimed at the erasure of underrepresented communities being passed across the country, not to mention the hateful rhetoric being normalized every day against marginalized communities, I wanted to highlight how during this time of what feels like very intense division that chosen families can offer a unique alternative."

In the shared video, Bourdon appeared against a backdrop featuring what resembled a Pride flag, a "Black Lives Matter" sign depicting a Black power fist, and various other posters and illustrations.

Online Backlash and Criticisms

The recirculated video clip ignited a wave of criticism from conservative voices on social media platforms, with several accounts alleging that the book advocates for children to distance themselves from parents who might not affirm their gender identity.

One prominent post, from the social media account known as Libs of TikTok, accompanied the video with the caption, "Meet Oregon High school counselor [Madi] Bourdon. She wrote a kid’s book about ‘chosen family’ which tells kids they can cut off their parents and find a new family if their parents aren’t ‘accepting’ of their gender identity."

Jennifer McWilliams, co-founder of the organization Courage Is A Habit, also weighed in on the discussion. In a social media post, McWilliams wrote, "Listen to Madi promote her book, ‘A Book About Chosen Family.’ It is a book that teaches children the ‘definition of family.’ Madi believes children should choose their family & the family they were born to is NOT more important than a ‘Chosen Family.’"